Last Tuesday, I spent two hours getting ready for a first date. Hair, makeup, the whole production. Drove 25 minutes across town to meet a guy who seemed promising – good job, owns his place, loves to travel.

Turns out he lives in another state, is looking for basically a “roommate” (my read) so he can make his move to Florida easier (with no job here), and his “love of travel” means he watches a lot of Travel Channel.

Sitting in my car afterward, I remembered reading a TechCrunch article about Bumble’s CEO talking about AI concierges. And I had a thought: What if AI could have gone on that date for me?

The Case for AI First Date Screening

I’m not talking about AI finding my soulmate or writing love letters. I’m talking about AI sitting through the awkward small talk, discovering the red flags, and reporting back: “Hard pass. He spent 20 minutes explaining why he doesn’t ‘believe’ in tipping.”

Think about it – we already use AI to screen our emails, filter our photos, and curate our news. Why not screen our dates?

Meta’s Actually Onto Something Here

Meta just launched AI assistants in Facebook Dating – little digital helpers that can chat with potential matches and help navigate conversations. They’ve got personas like “Brooklyn girl in tech” who can help you figure out if someone’s worth your Tuesday night.

And honestly? I’m here for it.

Because here’s what I’ve learned after years of dating apps: The first date isn’t really about chemistry. It’s about basic compatibility screening. Can this person hold a conversation? Do they have their life together? Are they going to spend the entire dinner explaining why all their ex’s are “crazy”? Btw Bob… all of them?  Let me hold your hand while I say this – you’re the common denominator…

When Bumble’s CEO Talked About Bot-to-Bot Dating

Whitney Wolfe Herd from Bumble mentioned AI “concierges” dating each other to find matches for humans. The audience laughed, but I’m sitting here thinking: That’s not crazy. That’s efficient.

Let the AIs handle the “What do you do for fun?” “Tell me about your family.” “What are you looking for?” conversations. Let them weed out the guys who think “Hey, beautiful” is a conversation starter and the ones who post gym selfies as their only photos.

The Real Problem with Dating Apps

Here’s my confession: I’m tired. Tired of getting dressed up for disappointments. Tired of driving across town for someone who catfished me with photos from 2006. Tired of explaining why “Netflix and chill” isn’t a first date plan to grown men.

Dating apps have given us infinite options but somehow made dating more exhausting. It’s like having a part-time job where your boss is terrible and you never know your schedule.

And before you chalk me up as a “man-hater”, I’m obviously not, because I still kept trying, I hear the same outcries from men too. I’m absolutely sure men out there are getting ghosted, last-minute cancelled on, love-bombed, and somehow slid into “roommate” discussion on the first date, too.  I think this is good for both sides!

What AI Could Actually Fix

Dating app companies are already investing millions in AI. Tinder’s using it to help you pick better photos. Hinge has AI helping write prompts that actually get responses. Match Group dropped $20 million on AI features across its platforms.

But they’re thinking too small.

What if AI could handle the entire vetting process? Not just matching, but actually going through the preliminary conversation phase. The AI could ask all the important questions: Do you live independently? Are you employed? Do you understand that women over 40 don’t have time for games?

And then, only then, would real humans get involved.

The Bigger Picture (Because I’m a Marketing Person)

From a business perspective, this makes total sense. We’re already outsourcing decisions everywhere – AI helps us pick what to watch, what to buy, even what emails are worth reading.

Why not outsource the obviously bad dating choices?

What I Really Want

I don’t want AI to replace human connection. I want AI to protect my time, my energy, and my good mascara from obviously doomed encounters.

I want AI to sit through the date with the guy who doesn’t ask a single question about me. I want AI to handle the man who’s “between jobs” (for three years) and thinks I should split the check on coffee.

Let AI do the heavy lifting so I can save my charm, my best stories, and my cute outfits for people who actually deserve them.

The Bottom Line

Maybe the future isn’t AI finding us true love. Maybe it’s AI saving us from wasting our Saturday nights on people who peaked in high school.

And honestly? That might be exactly what we need. I’ve already checked out of the whole dating scene years ago (minus the – I should’ve known better – Tuesday dash). Right now, I LOVE my peaceful life, and I don’t want anyone messing this up. BUT, would an AI concierge change my mind about signing up on dating sites again? … honestly, I think it would!  Throw in a nationwide background check for all involved – count me in!

Have you had enough terrible first dates that you’d let AI screen them first? Because I’m ready to sign up.